hahaha helll yeaa boiiii!!! lol haha im TOO pysched man!! exams today=total cake walk, pretty much thru all of them esp brit lit and theatre arts talked and  laughed thru it while helpin ppl out, makin it a group/class thing haha awesome, i knew i was gonna ace all these exams so like im STILL sleep deprived cuz the last 2/3 days ive just been up till 3 or later seriously brandon drunk calls me one night talk to him till 330am and then ant ant calls me (friend and co-worker from the TB! :) and talked till 2 or so....funnyyy kidd man had me crackin up!  he even noticed how much i was fine and confident, haha hes like damn im gonna have u crackin up all night and u got exams 2morrw u must kno u smart! haha and everyone keeps callin my past relationship "quick" haha "2 months?! thats how long u talk to a person" lol haha i guess...?? anyways! grades r gonna be fine not even worried at all...the only downside is that i have ACT again next sat! :( and the classes startin this mon-thurs but ehh o well...dont kno wat college im goin to yet, of course mom/dad wants me to stay close like ohio state, they KNO i aint stayin anywhere NEAR OR CLOSE to toledo, but ive been in love with michigan 4EVER lol and of course sierraa and alexa all wants to go to NY but o well we'll see we'll see we'll see!! super excited me sara jen maggie tanya etc etc already talkin about a trip to mexico!!! next summer right after we grad for a LEAST week!! gonna be sweeet we're all be legal cuz we're all gonna be 1188!! :) cant wait were gonna book it liek this fall/winter so we'll be all set and ready and prepared like by july wen we go nice, nice something to look forward to! lol umm yeah 2day was defintly sad! haha i was the last person to take down all the pics and shit from my locker :( last yr of havin our janky ass lockers haha me and ana walkin down the hall talkin about wat the colors r gonna be for next yr...how im gonna break my lock on mines since i hate those things and combinations im a dork i cant do that shit! lol and anas teasin me cuz im the last person to clear everythin out of my locker but i am sentimental and all i started this mornin and finished afterschool then a shit load of ppl went to chilis to eat lunch since we got out at 1 (never been there, it was good) and then me and my brent went to target! haha his #1fav store of all time i had a gift card there, ended up only gettin a pack of gum! lol even the cashier lady talked about me im super bummed cuz i didnt have enough money for this really sweet white purse for summer :( gotta go back or go to the mall...super jazzzed about gettin money soon!! paycheck from TB (last time i didnt get one, lack of working :( sucks lol and soon this hospital shin dig this summer 2 GS man! super pysched i already got a list of wat im buyin as soon as i get a big check! cant wait till im 18 in hmm 4 months?!! lol and i can get a credit/debit card, checkin account so i can get checks etc etc def piercing my belly (that is if im in good shape! im def workin on my body now more than ever!  gotta get back to the way i used to look :( workin at taco bell and eatin out all the time killlsss u! i cant anymore till i get paid only have $8 in the bank:( everyone always asks me where the hell it goes and i honestly dont knoo!! :( so my new years resolution (yeah i kno im late on this lol) is for me this summer to keep track in a notebook EXACTLY wat im spendin wat on and how much etc etc so i kno and ppl who ask me will kno! lol i just fele sooo good right now i feel like im really changin and growin up, a totally new chapter in my life right now, for all of us,  esp me ive been thru a lot this whooollee year esp this past week and im so done and over it and movin on and it feels aweesome! i got so many new numbers and new friends these past months, and today! haha gave my number out a lot cuz we seniors man! def gonna parrttyy! haha like 2night!! big bash on woodley! everyone go! its gonna be sweet then work 2morrw, date 2morrw night after workin 10-5 sunday chill out prolly....catch up on sum sleep i have a feelin i wont be gettin a whole lot lol still gotta catch up on freakin lack of sleep from this week! :( oo well its worth it! :) kmayy im done!! :) congrats to all us cchs juniors! (and other schools that i like lol) we made it guys! the only way to go is up!! and we're gonna rock and ...do good! and have fun! be safe guys this summer and im sure ill be seein more than half of all u kids! :) and now the REAL summer beginnsssss........

**yeaah just a little song me and my mommy was singin in the kitchen just now while we're all cookin for our big bar b q 2morrw! :) jazzz isnt all that bad sumtimes i love it actually....:)**

~Yesterday, when alone with just my tears, I wished all memories could somehow disappear.  Then today, its as a miracle touched, I felt you grow inside, my soul moved like the tide, for right before my eyes, there was you.....~

<3THEN I FINALLY OPEN MY HEART TO LOVE.....OR IS LOVE EMBRACING ME....HAVE I FINALLY LET GO OF ALL MY PAIN......OR HAS PAIN JUST SENT ME FREE??<3

~so long, yet afraid to take a chance, I knew too well the hurt which comes from a romance......now i feel, so much different than myself.....I just cannot explain.... somehow I'm not the same....too glad you came into my life.....~

<3HAVE I FINALLY OPEN MY HEART TO LOVE??  OR IS LOVE EMBRACING ME??  HAVE I FINALLY LET GO OF MY PAIN??  OR HAS PAIN JUST LET ME FREE??<3

<3HAVE I FINALLY OPEN MY WHOLE HEART TO LOVE?  OR IS LOVE EMBRACING ME?? HAVE I FINALLY LET GO OF ALL MY PAIN??  OR HAS PAIN JUST SET ME FREE??<3

awesome stuff huh?? 2853 better when you actually hear it but u kno...lol weekends been cool, super excited about 2morrw and my familys big bar b q a lot of ppl comin esp my 2 awesomest friends michele and julie (julie leaves for france AGAIN tuesday! :(....) lol and umm yeah fri hung out with sierra, her new boy simon and my boy....then sat AUDUTIONED FOR WEST SIDE STORY!! god im nervous i hope soooo much that i got in!!  o man its funny tho cuz becca barrow is cheoreographin it then mrs m!! glorias directin it and all us glee clubbers know thats OUR own personal director for our glee club musicals! and becca is a grad and daughter of the fabulous glee club director mrs barrow! lol werid....anyways they recongized me and sierra and meg and nate who tried out from cchs...the dance was sweet i didnt mind it but thats only cuz ive done it for several yrs sum guys and girls...oo lol it was bad and painful to watch im not gonna lie....and my singin was fine, mrs m stopped me after a couple of measures and i think its cuz she already knos or remembers how i sing since we all have to sing for the glee club musical....anyhoo! we'll see we're all gonna be gettin a call no matter what soon....keep ur fingers crossed!! if i make it the show will b in july downtown at the rep!! :) man it was just good seein all my old peeps, j-west, alex, cassie (aw me and brandons double date buddies :( lol....and so many other ppl it was sweet....i felt soo good it was like home...lol okay movin on sat night totally, completely ruined by the b/f...long ass story but to make it short i messed up but he messed up too but im over it and tryin to make it better, so after our big blow up i left and drank with sum ppl, mmmm smirnofff and sum other new stuff i havnt tried yet, definetly helped! lol i felt good after that, didnt go to bed till 130, 2....good old casey calls me at 230....then i went back to sleep only to get up at 745? to work at 8 at freakin taco bell (this is how much i love tremain, i filled in for him cuz he had prom sat night...grr lol)  i got a raise thats kindof good? lol got to work with me and micheles anothony! (hell yea tho we get paid this tuesday and i babysit my parents friends kids wed who tip me really nice so im gonna have more than liek 18$ in my account! yea! :).... so 8-liek 5 with maybe 4-5 hrs of sleep? so i crashed wen i got home obviously now im cool im gonna get caught up on whole lotta shit, liek cleanin room, doin sum hw liek math so i can get a reaall nice curve on the stupid exam thurs!!  lord knos i need it! :) then reviewin for other exams :(....and thats about it!!  hope 2morrw goes good have a good rest of the weekend guys!! hoped u liked the song im luvin it, im listenin to it over and over again right now lol :) im a dork i kno love u!

<3rach

hey everyone!  the week went by pretty damn slow but its okay i guess it wasnt too hard....the weekend was decent, i didnt work at all this weekend (even tho i couldve) and next weekend i can only work sunday cuz fri nights my dance recital and dereks 18th bday ! :) and sat is prom at night with derek :) soo yeaah i dunno...but it was nice not workin tho fri i just had dance afterschool then i met my family (my oldest brother came to visit this weekend with his new gf its mothers day and his bday today! 25! lol holy crap...) so i met them at calvinos then i went to dogsit saras dog lol got freaked out at her house since it was all dark outside and the dog kept barkin and im thinkin sumones outside about to attack/rape me haha so i call up michele and we get all caught up on things, its hard cuz i dont talk to anyone during the week except for derek lol anyways i talked to michele pretty late fri night at my house on the phone then derek then sleep, sat was babysittin till 12 noon, goin to dereks with taco bell food and watchin newsies couldnt even get thru half of it before i freakin fell asleeep!! usually derek does, i was soo mad and its ironic cuz i REALLY wanted to see newsies i couldnt wait so of course that would happen so im gonna have it to finish it another time soon brandons lettin me borrow it but i dunno for how long but itll be till im ready dammit! lol he can be pushy sumtimes....then after dereks rushed over to cchs for the gospel choir concert (thanks for everyone who came) it was a pretty good turnout i was a little surprised lol but it was hella long like 6 -930 and beyond prolly i dunno i finally left at liek 915 i was done, black ppl could have church all night if they could they just kept goin and goin and goin and we were done it was just u kno church preachin and tryin to get ppl saved lol im all for that but i just felt like i was okay and didnt need to be there standin and lookin around plus my brothers here i never get to see him who knos wen im gonna see him next (im pretty sure me and my mommy r gonna go down there this summer) and we had plans to go see MI3!! and we did and i brought derek along and it was SUPER GOOD! haha i was soooo into derek was makin fun of my but seriously sum stuff is just crazzzyy!!  lol i liked it a lot and i usually dont even liek movies liek that so yeah derek brought me home and man haha i got scared again cuz i thought shit was goin down in my neighborhood they were shitloads of cars after liek 1am and im wtf is goin on? hahha then i remembered sfs finished west side story and thomas jospeh (my neighbor) sfs senior guy was havin a cast party!! it was crazy lol i wanted to go over but none of my friends were in the cast this year, cept for rach and kev but i dunno if they even went my mom was up at 7am this mornin and ppl were leavin then! lol crazzy...i meen last night im in MY driveway in my bf cars just talkin and eveeryones parkin on my street talkin shoutin laughin w/e and they see us in the car outside of the car and just stare at us i realyl wanted to just stare back and yell at them y would they stare at me wen im on my property?? lol it was werid....but funny and today was church and nap and hw and brents house with ana to finish our video for theatre arts due um yea 2morrw!! lol dereks to see it since hes on it lol and then home to freakin finish the stupid religion paper due um yeah 2morrw too!!  lol so yea im gonna go now ttyl!  hope eveyrone had a good week and lets pray that this week goes by fasstt!! im scraed shitless cuz i have a big dance recital fri night and hope i dont mess up musical and everythin else messed me up a little cuz i missed sum practices, then i got prom sat!!(still gotta get a whole lotta stuff for it too!!)) so good but possibly bad weekend comin up hopefully it wont be bad! lol  okay bye!

<3rach

hello all!!  my weeekend was FABULOUS!  musical was awesome! fri night was prolly the best show!! special thanks for my baby comin! and all my super awesome friends julie michele kat and colleen!! congrats to super smart brainy but ooo soooo smokin hott alexa for gettin a superior in columbus for her science fair thingy AND THEN comin to see the musical sun!!! thats great and my other baby brent comin sat! lol anndd everyone else that did!! i really appreciate it all of us glee clubbers appreciate it!!  we had a blast and its kindof sad that its over...wow liek wat 3 more weeeks of school?!! aahh sad lots of sadness and cryin sun :( before and after show :( cast party was cool...had sum good bonding talks with people (ky alexis etc etc lol) and omg! haha the camera i had sun! thanks to everyone for participatin and bein on it! that was a lot of fun, goddamit its brents camera too i wish i could keep it, hes makin me want to get one!!!  it was a lot of fun!  i keep replayin it 3794 times! lol i love it esp the segment with me and my baby!! haha beat that anastasia!! so yeah no school today for us glee clubbers...prettty sweet but not so much cuz i havnt been home in a weekend so i gotta clean my room, clean the house and do sum fuckin school homework!! and 2morww rush around and catch up on shit! :( not fun.....but it was nice sleepin in till 1230 and still bein in shorts and a tank right now and not a uniform! lol so yea today just finsih cleanin and work, tues school piano, derek, wed school and DANCE!!!!! freakin recital is NEXT FRIDAy!!!!! thurs school hair and DANCE!!!! fri school dance!!!!! work!! and yeaa my brothers comin home to viist cuz its mothers day weekend and his bday and hes bringin his new gf:( i miss the old one tho but this one actually went to cchs, maybe ill kno her!  sat work and gospel choir concert :( lol grrr...sun church work and yeah :( no more glee club dance!  hopefully more derek time in the weekend too! lol  i wish i could work out more liek i used too!! god we all agree how the musical adds liek 4345 lbs to you! besides actin singin and dancin we ate and ate and ate!! lol mays just the worst month for me seriously its JAMMED PACKED! this weekend already full next weekend fri night dance recital at the valentine theater again! (yea!) (boo for dancin im soo scraed im gonna mess up!!)) and sat prom with my baby! nervous for that too! then the next weekend who knos but goddamit so much fuckin school shit to do too!! bacc and grad the end of the month and exams...and liek 3 religion projects! sucks ass man....i gotta do the act again in june, and julies leavin for france again :( no more courtesy corp, gotta find another job? volunteer at the library and hospital and work at hot and sweaty taco bell....lol grrr brents lake will be my SAVIOUR this summer!!  we were gonna go to cedar point 2day since we had the day off liek last year but nope too much shit to do! :( o well i gotta get to it now! ill ttyl!!!.....mmm i need sum chinese foood baaddd!! hhaa ok bye!!

<3rach